January 23, 2012 ~ Rock-a-bye Billy

Billy is a baby that likes to sleep. Normally, I don't have any trouble getting him to go to bed for a nap or for the night. He's tired, he goes straight down. But this past week has been another story altogether.

This past week he stands up in his crib and screams at the top of his lungs, voice cracking, heart-wrenching endless crying. For some reason he just refuses to sleep. Some of the blame has to go to those evil teeth that are plaguing him right now, but something else is obviously going on.

It's not as though Billy never throws a tantrum about going to bed. Sometimes he won't want to go to sleep and I will find all of his stuffed animals and blankets on the floor, binkies too and him crying in his crib. This is the attention getting technique.

But now Billy knows when I pour the milk into his sippy what is coming and starts to whimper. Then when I pick him up he starts screaming. I can rock him and get him to lay down, but as soon as I leave the room he stands up and starts screaming. It's not the normal crying. This past week has been a new level of anxiety in his voice.

I've heard that the human brain has a physical reaction to babies crying. Probably a throwback to when those cries could mean being eaten by a sabertooth. I can feel my stress level shoot through the roof. I just want to get him to quiet down. It's hard when the best thing for him is sleep and he refuses to.

Yesterday we had to let him cry it out. I hate CIO. He went on for more than a half hour before I binkied him up for the bazillionth time and he finally settled down. Today he was on track to do it again. Daddy's method is to just turn off the monitor and let him cry himself to sleep. I just can't take it. So after 20 minutes I had to go back in and get him.

What he wanted was to be fully rocked to sleep, with singing (God help him). But I rocked, shushed and sang just like when he was a teeny little guy. He clung to me and smiled as he drifted off. I would much rather rock him for 20 minutes than listen to him cry during that time. He fell asleep in my arms and no tears when I put him down. So much less painful than CIO for everyone.

November 19, 2011 ~ Me and My Shadow

Billy is my shadow. I use this to my advantage. I don't have to worry about where he's running off to, because he's always running to me. If I get up and walk into the kitchen, he gets up and follows right behind me. Sometimes he even cries if I don't beckon him to come with me. I think he must always worry that I'm leaving him, so he is my constant shadow.

Billy was in a Mommy mood today. All he wanted was to be with me. He was quiet and subdued from his normal self. And extra tired. He didn't eat very much and I suspect some teething might be going on, since he would cry every time he bit down on an animal cracker. Could just be a bruise- there's no too yet. We'll see.

He was so tired today that he fell asleep at 10:30 and had no complaint going to sleep. By for he was done in again and I had to put him down. He cried and cried. I'm not a fan of the Cry It Out (CIO) method. I let him cry for 5 minutes and then if he's still keeping up the rant I go check on him, but if he winds down then I wait until he stops before I make sure he fell asleep. I also hate letting him cry himself to sleep, but to keep him on schedule it's sometimes necessary.

So after five minutes of shrieking I went in with a binky and milk in hand. He was still laying down, but his binky was gone. I picked him up, gave him his binky and some milk. Then I went through the old routine I used to use to settle him and get him to sleep so many months ago. I'm glad to know that it still works and that I still have that magic sleep spell when it comes to my son. In less than five minutes I had him snoring in my arms and back in the crib for a good nap. I don't get to coddle him anymore- my toddler never sits still and gets put down awake now. I miss those days of infant Billy sleeping in my arms.